Teenagers are complicated

Sometimes teenagers come home and yell. It is entirely possible that they don't love you in that moment but generally do love you. It is likely they have other shit going on in their lives they don't know how to handle and take it out on you. Given many people have railed at me when they have their own issues, knowing I will forgive them, that I am a safe place to vent, I do have experience with this. Sometimes, it isn't about you. It really is them. You just have to hope they can forgive themselves and get past it and learn a new way to vent. Because everyone needs to vent. Just listen and respond as if the yelling were regular conversation. Or say, I'd like to help you with this but I can't hear you well while you are yelling. But don't take the yelling personally.

I think we do a disservice to teens tho in that as kids they had "playtime" and as mini adults they have none. Nothing is socially acceptable for them anymore. Even sports was taken away because they either have to be competing to be in the Olympics or nothing. School is all serious too with getting good grades and good test scores to get into college. For some kids this pressure starts in middle school. Then they et to college after years and years if seriousness and party their panties off. Is it really a surprise they seek out playtime when we denied it for so long?

Teenage girls, as they age need a network of girlfriends. The boys aren't going to give them the emotional attention they need. They need to be satisfied with their girlfriends attention and hugs instead of relying on boys for it. There may be a guy out there that can do it, but not all of them. So wait to date until one of those guys comes along. And guys, be the guy with too many hugs that pays attention. WHat kind of attention? Listening.