Raising Kids

Do we really raise kids? Like raising sheep? I met a mom once who was trying to think up a way to get her son to behave without yelling. "I don't like yelling" she told me. I'm pretty sure no one LIKES yelling, but it is usually a part of parenting. If you use it too much it becomes ineffective. If you don't use it enough, kids walk all over you. I am quite sure we don't want to be picking up their laundry off the floor and slogging it home to clean and fold it for them when they are twenty-something. There are a few things yelling does other than give you a sore throat and a clean room. One is that it shows the children what is important to you. If it is important enough that you yell about it, it must be important. You are teaching them your values. The other thing it teaches them is where the limits lie. Kids LIKE limits. Limits show you will not let them harm themselves, or others. Kids like to know someone is looking out for them. They like to know you are keeping them safe even from themselves. Kids will often make bad choices. This is normal. Having and enforcing limits with yelling, time out and even for some toddlers a spanking, show them that you are determined to do whatever it takes to keep them safe. Safe children are happy children.